in tune

"When you put your face next to an "A" string and begin to hum an "A" -that string will begin to vibrate. The "D" won't, the "G" won't, but the "A" will. Because it was created to vibrate with that tone. The thing about the story-God's story-is that when it is told and applied well, and when it is supported in a sensorial way, something inside our heart starts to vibrate, regardless of whether we are a Christian or not, because we were created for our hearts to vibrate with that story."
Dieter Zander

Trying to stay in tune with God can be a challenging thing. The world can pull me in different directions until I become out of tune. In those times it can be challenging to feel the "vibration" of God's voice. There are times of disconnect and dissonance. So I try and make time to get back into tune. I find the more I play the more I stay in tune. Always needing an adjustment here and there, but the more I play the easier the tuning becomes. It feels so great to feel that sensation of the voice of God speaking into my life. He has a great desire to use me as part of the instrument of His love. He longs for my story to be connected to His story and for His story to be revealed through mine. I want my story to be about Him and the wonders that He has worked in my life, so much so that the two become one, vibrating in perfect harmony.

sparks of beauty

"There is nothing God does that does not send off sparks of beauty that call attention to his redeeming and loving presence.The world, then, even apart from its interpretation in Scripture, declares the glory of God; it is an embodied witness to this redemption and love."
William A. Dyrness Visual Faith

I love the idea that God is all things. It is all intentional. It is all orchestrated. There is a beauty in things that connects us to greater things and draws us to a deeper relationship with God. I am constantly amazed and humbled by the greatness and beauty of nature. I am humbled by the intricacies and attention to detail. It was created for our enjoyment and pleasure. It is a witness to God's love.

perfectly blank

"The amateur believes he must first overcome his fear; then he can do his work. The professional knows that fear can never be overcome. He knows there is no such thing as a fearless warrior or a dread-free artist."
Steven Pressfield The War of Art

During the process of creation there are many things to overcome just to begin the process. Let alone the process itself. There is fear of how to start or if I should even start at all. Is my voice relevant, important, or necessary. There is a fear of the blank canvas. What will the first mark be. It will set the tone for the entire piece. I could be doomed from the start.
While painting I have developed the process of staining the canvas as a first step. When creating a digital file it is as simple as opening Photoshop. That first step that breaks the barrier of that precious blankness. Why is it so treasured? The fear of the great white abyss of open space. There seems to be so much potential and possibility. It takes discipline to take that first step, knowing full well that the start may not survive the process. And that is okay. Take a step. Make a mark. Write a word.
I heard once that most fears only need fifteen seconds of bravery to overcome. Dialing that number of a pretty lady and waiting for a "hello". Putting a job application in the mail. Walking on to stage to perform. The fear and nerves may not go away, but I have found it often wanes after an initial struggle. I like to think that nervousness is just anxious adrenaline. It is just waiting to be put to good use. To get moving. To make something beautiful.

it was tuesday

It was Tuesday. I awoke a little earlier to go through my usual routine of getting ready. But that day I left through a different door, went through the front lobby of the dorms and picked up a newspaper, to be read in between classes, and stuffed it in my drawing portfolio. I made my way over to the student book store to pick up some supplies for my drawing class that morning. Half asleep. The dull drone of the radio murmured in the background as I picked up my supplies. Something about an airplane crash or accident or something. I wasn't really listening and did not think much of it and headed off to class.
As people arrived in the drawing studio, more layers of the story began to be added to the group conscience. Much of it half-knowledge, speculation and a flavor of rumor. After a short period of time: class dismissed. Go home.
Crowds gathered around TV screens. The numbers growing as the hours as other students got out of beds and classes. Squinting. Confused. Like the allegory of the cave, seeing a new world in a different light.

Watching. Wondering. Waiting.

Then a second.

Did that really just happen?

A new perspective on life. Fear. Sadness.

Classes were canceled as we watched history in the present. Wondering how things would change. What would happen next?

Afternoon class. No cancellation? We quietly went to class curious of where the conversation would go. There was no mention of the days proceedings. Business as usual? Seriously? Nothing!?

Thursdays class. Apology. "I don't watch the news. I only read the newspaper." Conversation.

End of the semester. Cleaning out my drawing portfolio. That newspaper. Still unread from months before. A time capsule of what things were like before it all happened. Before the world changed.
A different time.

reknown

As the heavens are higher than the earth,
so are my ways higher than your ways
and my thoughts than your thoughts.

As the rain and the snow come down from heaven,
and do not return to it
without watering the earth
and making it bud and flourish,
so that it yields seed for the sower
and bread for the eater,
so is my word that goes out from my mouth:
It will not return to me empty,
but will accomplish what I desire
and achieve the purpose for which I sent it.

You will go out in joy and be led forth in peace;
the mountains and hills will burst into song before you,
and all the trees of the field will clap their hands.
Instead of the thornbush will grow the pine tree,
and instead of briers the myrtle will grow.
This will be for the Lord’s renown,
for an everlasting sign,
which will not be destroyed.
Isaiah 55:9-13

I love the word picture that this passage relates. I think it stems from my love of nature and the presence of God that I feel while taking in the majestic beauty of creation. This passage also speaks to the omnipotence of God and His desire for our lives. He knows His plan and is seeking to fulfill it.

dream team

The Dream Team (1992 USA Olympic basketball team documentary) from Arwind Gajadien on Vimeo.

I saw this video the other day and it took me back to my childhood. I remember my friends and I pretending to be our favorite players and reenacting plays and creating great new ones. We had an adjustable rim so we could lower the hoop and dunk like the big boys. Our hoop was also located at the bottom of slanted driveway and the flat part of the alley, so sometimes there were some foot adjustments that needed to be made to stay balanced. There always seemed to be ten seconds left. ten, nine, eight... I was ten years old. My favorite player was number 33. Scottie Pippen from the Chicago Bulls. Everyone else loved Jordan but I was always a Pippen fan. Maybe it's my love of the underdog. But you know what they say, "Defense wins championships." and Scottie was one of the best. He was also gifted at using the glass which always intrigued me. I think that might be related to my nerdiness and the geometry involved. Sometimes memories are sweeter that what really happened in life. I got a dose of that watching this documentary. Seeing the arrogance that these guys had was hazy to my ten year old self who just say the amazing basketball moves. Maybe that is one of the joys of childhood.